EP 117 & 118: The impact of negative emotions on physical & mental health with Catherine LifeDesign

Welcome back to the Think Happy Podcast. I am Kaitlin and I am here with my friend Catherine, Catherine. Welcome to the show. I'm so happy you're here. Hello.

It's such an honor to be on your show. Thank you so much Kaitlin.

Oh, my goodness. You're so sweet. You guys, Catherine has been the most patient person in the history of patient people when it has come to scheduling this. So let, ok, let me just like take a step back in time because our original conversation, like our preinterview conversation that we had scheduled, I had to rebook because I got strep throat and then our interviews have gotten rebooked like at a minimum of two times. 

Oh, boy. Like, like you have just been glorious. Thank you so funny enough. Go ahead.

Yeah. You know, it's, I, I really live by that rule that, if something gets rescheduled because sometimes I have to reschedule stuff. If something gets rescheduled, it usually suits me perfectly well. So, really don't feel bad about it at all. It's like, oh, yeah, I was given the gift of time just now so I can do something else. It's, it's fine. I love it actually.

What a beautiful reframe. That is glorious. I'm all about a reframe and that, oh my gosh, 10 out of 10 Catherine. That's great. So, so funny enough talking about, you know, rescheduling this so many times today, we're here to talk about overcoming procrastination. 

Always, you know, feeling like you're running behind, feeling like you just don't have enough time, you know, all of those not so fun things with the unique twist of how these feelings just really play a part in our physical and mental health. I think this conversation it's gonna be gold. So before we dive in, I wanna pause and just ask you to introduce yourself to us.

Thank you so much. Yeah, my name is Catherine and I've chosen like kind of stage name. So I call myself Catherine LifeDesign because, you know, there was a time where I was not able to be who I was and I didn't feel free at all. I went through emotional and narcissistic abuse as a, as a child or in my early teens and I became obsessed with like designing my life.

So that's why Catherine LifeDesign. But so the thing is I'm a system friendly business coach. And literally, for a couple of years, I became very, very ill. I became chronically ill. I was somewhat bedridden. I had chronic fatigue, autoimmune disease and 30 other symptoms. And it took me years and years and years and I found the right tools and within four months I healed.

So this is a lot of, I get a lot of questions around that usually. But the curious part was literally that through applying those tools that healed me to my business and myself and my life, literally, I, I transformed and completely got rid of procrastination, perfectionism, overwhelmed self doubt.

I just, I don't do that stuff anymore. It's just completely vanished from my life and from my business. And I was like ha interesting. So what healed me also skyrocketed my business? So that's me, but we're going to talk a lot about that later. So, yeah, thank you and welcome everybody to the show. Yay.

Oh That's amazing. I, so after that introduction that you just gave us, it does not surprise me that you are a master full refram. That's amazing. So for you, I know that, you know, procrastination, perfectionism overwhelm, self sabotage. All of those highly relatable feelings showed up as a by-product or as a symptom of something much larger, larger at play for you.

Which you've already kind of hinted at. And before we get even further into this conversation, I do want to say that what I love so much about your story, Catherine is that you were able to get to the root of what was causing these symptoms for you rather than just putting a band aid on the symptoms and never addressing or healing the root. 

I was on Instagram the other day talking about, you know, taking the time to really address the root of feelings, symptoms, unpleasantries that we're having or experiencing in our lives. So that they actually go away for, for, for the long term, not just for the short term because I truly believe that if we're just addressing the symptoms, the root is going to rear its head again and again and again until we address it.

Absolutely. And you know, what's so curious? I was like, probably everybody else. I was looking for solutions to the symptoms. So I was like, ok, so how do you overcome procrastination? Oh, well, you know, more discipline and, and whatever mindfulness and meditation and I, I don't know so many different things. I swear nothing ever worked for for me. I was literally like, ok, there must be something wrong with me because why can I not get myself to do this and why do I end up in at this point over and over and over again? 

You know, where I'm like, Oh, this is so much pressure. I'm so stressed out. I have to do this. I have to do this. I'm, you know, it's now a last minute it's, oh, the horrible discomfort and horrible feeling of, you know, letting things run and go on for so long and, and never really dealing with them until it's so last minute and you become so stressed out. I really hate that. Like, even thinking back. I'm like, oh well.

And also I think that those are all feelings that so many of us can resonate with. I think we've all been there. And if you haven't been there, please speak up and tell me so that I can schedule an interview with you so that we can learn all about your tips and tricks and suggestions.

But you, you, you really teed things up really well here for me, Catherine. So let's start back at the beginning of your story of your journey. You know, how was procrastination, perfectionism? How was it presenting itself in just your day to day life?

Hm. So one specific example I remember really well, this was like 2015, 14 15, something like that. I I became obsessed with like online courses. I was like, I'm gonna do, I'm gonna produce and create an online course. And I was a, a purpose and business coach back then already. But purpose, meaning I wanted to help people find the purpose and turn it into an offer, turn it into a product, like literally find out why am I here on this planet and how can I share this gift with everybody else?

 Like kind of, yeah, purpose coaching. And I was like, I'm gonna do a course for that topic. And so I, I dipped my toes into the water and asked around and said, is this something you might be interested in? And people were like, yes. Oh my God. You know, I, I really, oh, this sounds great because I've been looking for what to do and how to run my business and how to turn my, my purpose into my business for a long time.

I was like, great, you know, people were interested in that subject. It's like, ok, I'm gonna do it. So a couple of months later, the same people were like, hey, you know, how is your course coming along? Is it, is it ready yet? I'm like, yeah. No, no, not yet. But soon God, fast forward another year. I mean, it's, it was always like, I'll do it next month, I'll do it next month.

And, I didn't get this course created like until I think two years later and, when I had a coach who was like, oh, do it, you know, almost like that. I was like, ok, I'll do it, but I needed some, someone kind of almost standing over me and make me do it. So that was one thing and, and, you know, I was so frustrated with myself because this course was something I really wanted to do.

I was like, how, what's wrong with me? You know, this is important to me. How come I'm not getting into gear and how come I'm not doing what I really want to do. So that was one thing, but the other thing is, of course, you know, everyday life, like having to a, to do list and especially the things that I did not enjoy doing. Oh my goodness. I would just put them off, put them off, put them off until it was midnight or whatever. 

And I sat there probably then all night long trying to get it done, you know, the very end and it was just so uncomfortable and then I was tired the next day. So I realized this is not doing me any good. But I mean, a lot of people realize that and a lot of people just like myself still could not get themselves to do it differently the next time. So I was still struggling. I hated the state. I was in tired, frustrated and all those things and still could not change that. I felt really unable to change that.

So, yeah, that's how it started in my business, especially what's so interesting about that is that really?

I have never thought about how procrastination really is a form of self sabotage because y yes, you were definitely, you know, doing a disservice to the people who were interested in your course and who could have benefited from your course. But really the biggest person you were doing the disservice to was yourself. Absolutely. Because I mean, from the multiple conversations that we've had to this point, I can tell the listeners that, you know, Catherine is definitely someone who thrives off of pouring into others. 

And I have a feeling that that is a way that you fill your own cup by serving others. And so by putting this course off, you were doing yourself the disservice of not allowing yourself the opportunity to pour into people in this capacity and to help them find their purpose, which in turn helps you to keep your own cup full. Man, I have never thought about how intertwined those two are amazing.

I feel like I was letting myself down over and over and over again. And this also applies to the other things we mentioned briefly, perfectionism, overwhelmed self doubt, you know, they're very similar in nature. I mean, they're different, of course, but they're very similar in nature in that that you you know, if you get, I got stuck in overwhelm a lot and I would literally feel like unable to move.

And again, that would cost me a week or something, you know. Oh my God, it's all too much. It's all too much. Of course, I didn't continue creating that course, if I'm completely overwhelmed again, you feel almost like you're letting yourself down, you're stuck perfectionism, you know, taking three weeks or, I don't know, three hours for something that you could be doing in two minutes.

I mean, it was the same kind of thing. You almost delay your own success with that. And I love how you, you phrased it as self sabotage. It absolutely is. Yeah, you're letting yourself down because it could be so much easier. You could be thriving, you could move the world forward, you could move your own life forward and you could serve others. Yeah, totally.

And something else is, I really think it has a tendency to become a snowball effect. But what's interesting is it's a snowball effect either way, it's gonna be a snowball effect. If you're pro procrastinating, procrastinating, putting it off, putting it off, that snowball grows bigger and bigger. And all of a sudden this task, this course that you're wanting to create the these doctor's appointments that you're needing to schedule, you know, whatever it is that you're procrastinating all of a sudden, feels so much bigger. 

And almost daunting then really it needs to. But on the other side, if you flip the coin, on the other side, you know, momentum, posit forward, momentum also has a snowball effect, right? And so once when you are not procrastinating, when you are going, you know, that's why I always, say to people when you have your big goals, you know, break them down into baby steps so that, you know, exactly what your starting point is, your starting point can be so, so, so small. 

But what it does is it's that first step and momentum and that's gonna build, that's gonna go, you know, an object in motion stays in motion. Yada, yada, yada. I could use all the analogies in the world. I know that's not an analogy that's like science or whatever, but I never know the difference. Yeah.

Yeah, it is what it is. So, listeners, you have the opportunity to decide if that snowball is growing for the positive or to your detriment. So OK, Catherine. So, so that's the beginning. OK. Now my follow up question to this is at what point did you realize that, you know, this was something that you needed to proactively address?

And I say proactively address because you've already mentioned how, you know, for a while you were trying to find solutions for the symptoms. And so when I say proactively address, I mean, you know, digging deeper than just addressing the symptoms, addressing the root of it.

So at what point did you realize that here is where it gets dramatic?

And so, yeah, I, I mean, I realized I proactively need to address it a long time ago, I was obsessed with time management with self management, you know, even created my own planner, oh, created my own to do list thingy. And, you know, some of these like spreadsheets and I was obsessed with planning. I was like, oh, maybe I just need to plan better and, and all those kind of things that we usually go to or go through rather.

But here is where it becomes really odd in so many ways because, this is around 2019. And all of a sudden I got a diagnosis of autoimmune disease and from then onwards, I got worse, worse and worse. It was Hashimotos. A lot of people suffer from Hashimotos, which is a thyroid disease. And then I, I became pregnant. I had a miscarriage. My hormones were going all over the place.

I had a lot of emotional stress. with my family, I also was in the middle of a book launch. So it was super stressful at work and all of a sudden my health and my whole life collapsed and I know it sounds so weird and I was, you know, for 38 years, I was never ill. I'd never, you know, I never even had colds like every five years I get a cold maybe, you know, even if that much.

So all of a sudden everything collapsed and I became bedridden. I, I could not, I did not have the energy anymore to get out of bed. I got the diagnosis of anxiety, chronic fatigue. Yeah, what else is inflammation in the whole body? So yeah, lots of pancreas problems and so many different things. All of a sudden I was like, what is going on? It was a new week, a new symptom pretty much.

Yeah, and here is the very curious thing because like you were saying earlier, you, you referenced something like that. We never, we never realize that all these symptoms might be connected. And this is the fun part. If you go to a doctor with thyroid disease, they're gonna treat your thyroid and they're gonna go, here's some medication you're gonna have to take that for the rest of your life.

And if you go to a psychiatrist and he, I got a diagnosis of depression, for example as well. I got the the diagnosis of CPTSD like complex trauma and I was like, what? Trauma? Yeah, I mean, my child, yeah, I moved out at 14. Yeah. My childhood wasn't the best but you know, I've had, I've not had a problem for the last 20 years. What is going on? So you get that diagnosis, you get treated like mental health, a psychologist, you know, like therapy and all those things and here is the weird thing. 

What do all these things and I mean, long COVID depression, anxiety, even Lyme disease, insomnia, burn out, procrastination. And this is at the beginning of the spectrum. I now truly believe it's a spectrum. What do all these things have in common? And the answer is a dysregulated nervous system. So this is, this is what just like was mind blowing to me back then?

I was like, oh, so OK, so I'm running around with the dysregulated nervous system. What does that even mean until I realized that, you know, we are not millions of years but 10 thousands of years old, like our bodies are created for a, a life and a a time long ago and no matter how modern we might be and, and how many, how much technology we are using, our body still only has four responses to stress which is fight flight, freeze or fawn and fawn is a kind of people pleasing state where you you try to keep yourself safe by pleasing the other person basically. 

So people pleasing is a, is a nervous system state and those are the four responses. So here comes the ugly truth, procrastination, perfectionism, overwhelmed, self doubt are trauma responses and you might go, oh, but I haven't experienced trauma. You know, it's not like my childhood was ok or whatever, trauma doesn't mean anything else.

But that your nervous system at one point in your life or several times in your life went into a state of overwhelm and did not know anymore how to keep you safe. This can be anything from, you know, your dad shouting at you and going go to your room, you know, something like that and you look, he doesn't love me anymore. That's what your, your limbic brain thinks the limbic brain is in charge of survival.

So we go into, you know, not being loved or having the feeling I'm wrong. That is a threat to our system, especially as a seven year old or however old we are. And so your system went into your limbic brain went into overwhelm and again, responded with one of the four options it had and it might be, you know, getting angry, it might be flight is not, you have to think of this differently.

Flight is not, we don't run away, which is flight might be something like we sit there, our colleague is chatting something really uncomfortable or you know, mobbing what's it called? Like bullying or something? And and we're just like, oh God, I I can't believe he's doing that. This feels horrible. I wish he would stop. I wish this was over.

I wish this didn't happen. That is flight. We don't run away as such. We're just like, oh God, I wish it would stop. That can be a flight response, for example. So now looking at procrastination, coming back to that procrastination is a mix between flight and freeze. This is what procrastination truly. Is. And in my case, I got so so dysregulated that I had what's called a perfect storm.

But like when like all the systems start collapsing because your Olympic brain is like danger, danger, danger shut down. And that's my, my bedridden state was so fatigued. I was in total freeze mode. So it's not like that I couldn't physically walk. I probably could, but I wasn't able to anymore. And my body went into complete shutdown and said, you know what? I don't know what to do anymore. 

So maybe if we pretend we are dead, you know, or we go into freeze mode if we don't do anything at all anymore, maybe that's the last resort. That's the last way to keep us safe. So that is procrastination. It's freeze and flight together. Perfectionism is a combination between freeze and fun like the people pleasing. overwhelm is just a nervous system state of your limbic brain looking for answers, looking for solutions but not being able to find it.

So sorry, I interrupt me if I'm going too far, but like in order this is I'm I'm like, this is so interesting.

I I had no idea. Oh yeah. And I I wanted to mention that actually, I was mentioning earlier that this might be a spectrum. I truly believe that I have a, a graphic on my website actually because this is how it unfolded for me. So in the you know, in the, the early signs of a disregulation, nervous system are exactly those things, you know, procrastination sometimes like quite heavy PMS or something like that, like menstrual and hormonal problems.

Self doubting, self sabotaging. Yeah, all those, all those things and then it kind of progresses to what I also had was food intolerances. I had sleep difficulties, you know, it kind of really progressed and then, and then came, you know, in fertility problems, miscarriages, autoimmune disease. So this is the higher end of the spectrum.

Sometimes cancer, even all those things. I'm not saying nervous system regulation or this regulated nervous system causes cancer. But and this is probably the most important sentence that I ever had to understand. And yeah, I get this when we are in fight flight freeze or fon basically, when we are in survival mode, our body shuts down all non essential stuff because our limbic brain is saying, you know what, we're going to have to survive this fight first.

Then we can think about digestion again, we have to survive first. Then we can think about having babies and producing the right hormones to do that. So sometimes we get stuck in a chronic fight, flight freeze and fall response. And what happens then your body keeps shutting down all the things immune system included. And and this is where that, this is where I got stuck and this is the most important sentence when we are in fight flies, fight flight, freeze of fun.

We do not digest, we do not produce hormones. We do not look and look after, you know, wound healing or shiny glossy hair. Everything is shut down and that's the perfect breeding ground for any chronic illness. So I'm not saying everybody is going to get cancer. I'm just saying if you are shut down, your body is not doing its job, it's not working the immune system to help you overcome certain things. So in order to heal, we actually need to get our nervous system out of that state of fight flight, freeze f and move it into rest and digest. That's our job.

I'm so intrigued by this Catherine. So when, ok, so you had mentioned that initially, you know, you were going to doctors for the anxiety and then you were going to doctors for some of the like physical illness and, and, and stuff like that. How did you, what type of doctor or what? Even if it wasn't a doctor who introduced this to you, how did you figure all of this out that it was all connected to your nervous system?

I did not figure this out myself. It was my neighbor and my neighbor was struggling with a whole range of symptoms as well. And the fun part is she's a doctor. She is a normal doctor and she could not heal herself, she was getting sicker and sicker by the day and she said what is going on and some, I don't know where she had it, you know, where she got it from.

But anyway, she's like, hey, have you ever heard of brain retraining? I'm like, brain what? You know, no idea. So we started, this online course together but brain retraining, which also helps you to go into rest and digest. I added another couple of certificates and courses and whatnot later for nervous system dysregulation. And you know, so this is how it built.

I had no idea but a couple of really clever people came up that this is a dysregulation in the, in the nervous system and the nervous system is controlled by the limbic brain. That's why I keep mentioning it. So you need to target both. But she was a doctor and like, yeah, she, she had so many symptoms. It was unbelievable.

So now here's like a million dollar question that I have for you. What did you do to address it and heal?

Yeah. Yeah, I love that. So first of all, I really want to tell everybody listening that especially if you're procrastinating or you're suffering from perfectionism or whatever. There is nothing wrong with you. It's not your fault. This is, this is so important because for me, for the longest time I thought, you know, oh, I'm just too lazy.

I'm just too whatever. I I'm not disciplined enough and, and all those kind of things. So, that is not the case. It's our nervous system, how our nervous system responds to certain things like pressure threat, all those things, we pick that up from clues from our parents nervous systems, for example, or how we grow up. The problem then is when we, as we get older, we never repent our nervous system.

So I always mention Donald Trump. You know, do you think Donald Trump has a, an adult nervous system? I highly doubt it because if, if he's poked and provoked, he will respond with fight. You know, he's like, yeah, you know, he, he really goes into that state. So this is you can be 80 you can be 60 or 30 have the nervous system capacity of a 13 year old.

And this is what, you know, this is me. I mean, this is 90% of adults walking around have never repented their nervous system because see, basically, like I was mentioning earlier, if you get told off as a seven year old, that is life threatening to you and you could go into survival mode thinking, oh, something's wrong with me. Mom needs me to be differently.

You need to behave differently. So you start self doubting yourself and, and things like that. So, you know, fast forward 20 years when we're like 40 somebody goes, oh you idiot, you know, it's not a threat to us. Like who's that person anyway, if, if a neighbor doesn't like us. So what? It's, it's nothing, it's nothing to us, but our nervous system doesn't know that.

And you can see that with all the, the battles and, and comments and like hate speech and whatnot on the internet. There's adults battling out their nervous system states basically. So, and we are not grounded, safe, peaceful. So this is this is how you can tell. But first of all, so I'm gonna walk you through this process very briefly. The first thing we can do is start with nervous system regulation.

And that means we create capacity and that's a very physical thing actually. It's so for example, if somebody attacks us verbally, you know, we can just go into this mode of, oh my God, he's attacking us and, and respond to that. But physically we can ground ourselves or we can train the vagus nerve, which is in charge of putting us into rest and digest the parasympathetic nervous system.

And so we can realize nervous system regulation means that we use the body to realize we are safe because our mind might be racing, but we're using the body to to send signals to the brain. Hey, I'm actually sitting here in, you know, behind my computer, I'm safe and sound. I have food. I am warm and it doesn't matter what somebody else says at that moment.

So we use, we use the body for that because mentally, you're probably like, you know, idiot and you're kind of like trying to retaliate if somebody attacks you verbally. So nervous system regulation is all about using the body to create a sense of safety. And that's the very first part. The second one is neuroplasticity, which means our brain can learn new things and can adapt.

So we start with a method called brain retraining where we literally change how our limbic brain responds to threats. So we have this little thing in our limbic brain called the Amygdala. And it's constantly checking. Are we safe? Are we not? Are we safe? What, you know what's going on? 

And if it sees something that even in the slightest resembles anything dangerous we've experienced before it rings the alarm checks with the hippocampus if which is in charge of memory and then gets the nervous system to respond like you know, quicken our heart rate, widen our pupils, that kind of thing. So what we do with brain retraining, we tell the Amygdala that is not dangerous, like our to do list and having to do things and experiencing a bit of discomfort and pressure is not life threatening.

So we train, we change the way our brain interprets things and with that, we rep parent our our nervous system basically. Yeah. So those are those are the two most important steps. Wow. Does that make sense?

Yeah, it does. I actually, I was looking up some notes that I have. I had another guest on the show who talked a lot about the nervous system. And so for the listeners, if you are just as intrigued on this topic as I am, those, episodes are with Sheridan Ruth episode 90 91. And Catherine, I feel like you would love listening to that conversation too. You and Sheridan would be like total best friends. Yeah.

And I'm such a nerd. I'm a nervous system nerd at this point because it's changed my life. It saved my life. So, yeah, absolutely.

And I also think that let's, we talked a decent amount about the nervous system with my guest Rebecca who was on not too long ago. Let me see if I can find this 104 and 105. We had had a conversation about finding purpose through your children, money mindset specifically for women. And leveraging the nervous system is like part of, of her process as well.

Love it. And it's I work a lot with entrepreneurs because the pressure and, and you know, self management is just huge with, with us. And what was I gonna say? Yeah, so I always say nervous system, well, I always say entrepreneurship is a nervous system game, not a mindset game because, and this is another really important factor. Guess who controls the mind.

Hm. Again, it's our limbic brain. Like if our limbic brain goes into survival mode, the prefrontal cortex, which is sort of our rational mind goes offline. So you might be doing as much mindset work as you think you need to. But if you're in survival mode, your mind and your rational mind and brain is not function. So again, we need to first get us get our nervous system out of survival mode and then we can think rationally and then we can talk about mindset.

So mindset is useless if you're in survival mode. And that's why I worked so hard to change my mindset around things like procrastination as well. I was like, all right, I'm going to be more disciplined. I'm gonna be, you know, all those things, right? It did not work. Mindset, work did not work for me because I was in chronic survival. 

And the interesting part is I did not know that I did not feel stressed because once we entered this space of chronic stress, our body, for example, produces more receptors for stress hormones. So it's still it is, your body is still really stressed, but you don't feel it as much anymore. I did not feel stressed and I was in chronic, I had a chronic stress response basically crazy.

So having also suffered from anxiety and overwhelm, I know that it can feel so consuming and almost just daunting to address. So for our listeners who I'll call it, who are at their starting line of this journey of overcoming these feelings, these symptoms. Do you have any suggestions or tips for them?

Yeah. I can show you one of my favorite exercises but be very aware that this is a multi, what do you call it, multi prone approach? Is that what you call it? So, yeah, kind of my first language but not sometimes like I, I speak German as well and sometimes I mix things up. But anyway, grew up in the UK. So yeah, multi prone approach. And so you need several layers to really transform these things.

But I'll, I'll show you a very quick one and please try this out because I was mentioning earlier the vagus nerve and the vagus nerve runs through your neck. So it kind of runs through your neck and into the rest of your body. It's, it's kind of like, yeah, the parasympathetic nervous system and if we can train that, we can tone our vagus nerve to put us back into rest and digest quick, quickly or quicker.

So in the next time, for example, you are procrastinating. Don't, don't go like, oh what's wrong with me? Why, why, why am I so lazy? Those kind of things? They don't work. Anyway, we've already established that. But what you can do is speak the language your body understands. So, what you can try out is, an exercise called VUOM. And all it is go do this for two minutes, 2 3 minutes and you literally just breathe in and then go.

So basically you can do VU all the time as well. It doesn't matter if you prefer, you can do that as well. You can also go, ah, it really does not matter. All you need to do is kind of get your throat and your voice cords to vibrate because that is a signal to the brain. And this is physical. You cannot, you cannot not like, trick your body, but, your body will respond because it's a physical sensation.

So you basically get your voice chords and your vagus nerve to vibrate. I don't know if the VS vibrates but, you know, this vibration in the neck and in the throat, causes the para sympathetic, to switch on. And, and you will be calmer. And I had a, I have a client and she was like, oh God, I'm not, not another one of those, you know, strange mindfulness, whatever exercises, meditation.

And that's never worked for me. I'm like, I know it's never worked for me either. Go do this for two minutes and she did and she was like, Catherine, I can't believe it. I, I actually do feel calmer. I do feel a lot calmer right now. So it might sound like a silly exercise and it's definitely not a heal all, you know, create, solve all symptoms. But it's one of the many things we can do with nervous system regulations and, and everybody loves some exercise and does love the other.

So it's, it's a kind of pick and pick and match whatever suits you pick and mix. And it's just one exercise that calms our nervous system down immediately pretty much. And it's so funny because we used to sit there on a Sunday in church singing. So I think we used to do a lot of nervous system friendly things that we don't do anymore. Or Buddhist monks going on, you know, that kind of thing.

So, yeah. Yeah. Wow, that is something to add to your toolbox. Absolutely. So as we start wrapping up this amazing insightful conversation, but I have two more questions for you. First question is one that I ask every guest that comes on the show and that is, do you have a life or happiness hack that you use in your own life that the listeners might want to try out for themselves?

Hm. That is such a beautiful question. So, yes, absolutely. But the problem is I have so many by now, I have a huge toolbox. So I think I will go with yeah, the most important thing for me and in order to return to rest and digest and return to safety and that also means be happy and joyful. And a couple of years ago, my life was not happy and joyful.

Seriously. I was so stressed and, and, and like I said, chronically ill. So this is the most important thing I always look into. Ok, what am I feeling right now? Am I in fight flight, freeze or phone or whatever? And with that, I respond and counterbalance that. So I do a lot of somatic movement. For example, if I, if I go into like a fight mode and I get frustrated or angry, that is a lot of energy your body is producing, that energy needs to go somewhere and not by sitting on the couch.

So if you are feeling frustrated, move seriously, if you are feeling in flight mode, then start slowly walking around and, and move off that, that flight mode and by the end of it, I lie down on the ground. So I go in with flight, I go from like really active to still with fight. I go like really, really active and like strong and, and and physical to again a calm state with freeze, we're obviously already in shutdown.

So we need to slow, slowly introduce activity again. It could be very gentle, like touching your face or your, your you know, if you feel like you can't move at all, just do a little bit of gentle touch. So I think my my life hack is really responding to what state I'm in and there is no judgment, there's no shame. If I feel shut down because something bad has happened, I lovingly take myself through that to change my state with somatic movement and fingers nerve and, and all those things. 

So that is, that is one of my biggest life hacks because you immediately, you go away from this, you know, fighting it in your own head. Why is this and why has this happened? And, and these things, you immediately take it to the physical level. It was like, ok, what is my physical state? Like how am I responding to this? And then you lovingly take yourself to the other side.

So you told us what you do for fight flight and freeze. What do you do for fawn?

Fawn is a really good one. I think fawn is, more of, again, it's, it's not feeling safe the way things are at the moment. Maybe that is not feeling safe with the person you're with, maybe that is not safe in what is being said. So the very first thing is I would continue, I would start to create safety in my own body and I would probably do that by touch.

So sometimes we can't get out of a situation like when a restaurant, I take my hands and just put them on my, my thighs and touch them and, you know, move them around a little bit. It's very inconspicuous. Nobody can see that like it's very secret really. And I go I'm safe, secure and stable or something like that. And I, I make my body feel that. So I don't focus on the other person.

I don't focus on what they've said. I don't focus on my inner story. I go through the body and make myself feel safe again. And really this is about having your own back and standing, you know, standing in your values of who you are and how you do things. So, yeah, the very first and most important thing is safety, creating safety in who you are. I hope that makes sense.

No, it does. It totally does. Thank you. Final question. Where can we connect with you?

Oh, I'd love to connect with you all. Really? Because as you can probably tell I'm total nerd when it comes to these things. So I'll shout it from the rooftops literally because like I was saying, it healed me, it changed my life. So I'm like, yeah, any, any channel and any anywhere. So I'm on Instagram, of course, Catherine LifeDesign. I am also on Facebook, Catherine LifeDesign. But the easiest way and that way you also have, you know, something to go with and, and, and start your journey maybe of regulating your nervous system. 

My recommendation is to go to my website and do the nervous system test because that will tell you, am I dysregulated how dysregulated am I? And then you will get a lot of tips and tricks and, and all those things. so Katherine Life design.com and I think it's slash nervous hyphen system hyphen test. That's it. But we might include that in the show notes anyway.

Yes. Yes, we will include that in the show notes. I'm making a note right here links for show notes so that we can add that. All right. Well, Catherine, thank you so much for your time. Thank you for pouring into us and listeners go hang out with Catherine. She truly is a gem. And with that being said, I will be back in your ears next week with another episode of the Think Happy Podcast.