EP 116: Lightening Your Mental Load Through Morning Routines

Hello, welcome back to the Think Happy podcast. You have just me today, just me. I'm actually really looking forward to the topic that I have planned for us today. I look forward to all of the topics, but I think this one is very timely in that it's on a topic that I have heard from you guys a lot. Like if that makes sense, you guys have been messaging me about this and we're going to talk about it.

Ok. So let's see here. What am I doing? What life updates can I share with you, this week has been tough. James has been feeling under the weather. He had a fever yesterday. So, Oakley and I, you know, like moved our schedules around so that we could make sure that he got to stay at home. And, little guy, it's tough being a little kid. It's tough, Eleanor is doing well.

So she transitioned to what we're calling her big girl bed. So it's still her crib, but we just took one of the rails off of it so she can get in and out by herself now. And this, she has this new level of freedom that she's not quite sure what to do with. I need to set the hatch her night light and sound machine up so that like the lights switch at a certain time to help her have that visual cue of when she's allowed to actually get up.

Because this morning she was up around like 5:30 I'm pretty sure so little girl needs more sleep than that. Her father and I need her to stay in bed longer than that, most importantly. Ok, so yeah, those are our updates. Send me send James well wishes because little guy is just, yeah, not feeling 100% excuse me. Ok. So today's conversation is about the mental load that specifically women feel.

Ok, I know it's a struggle. I know it's a big heavy struggle and I know that some days it feels like it only grows and never shrinks. I see you. I hear you. I feel you, you are not alone. Ok? And I want to help you tackle this in a way that feels good to you. And one of the best ways that I know how to help you alleviate some of this mental load that you feel is to help you create a consistent time and space for you to focus solely on you.

Ok. So this brings me to drum roll, morning routines and not just morning routines, but sustaining routines through different seasons of life. Ok. So today we're gonna talk about not only how having a morning routine can help you to lighten your mental load, but we're also going to talk about how to stick with it. Ok. So to start, I want to walk you through a few like transitions or versions of my own morning routine that has kind of varied just over the past many years.

So to start out, let's just call this version one. Ok. So when I first started my morning routine, I did not even know that quote unquote morning routines were a thing. If I had to guess I would say this was probably not long after I graduated college before I started, you know, waking up before I needed to wake up. So I'm gonna say this was close to 12 or 13 years ago, maybe around 2012.

And really, once I started this morning time, I haven't really looked back. But ok, so a few years into having a morning routine without realizing that I was on the morning routine bandwagon is when I started feeling really connected to the quiet time and I started becoming more intentional about it and I started craving it. But like at first that is not how it was.

So there was definitely a shift from, I'll wake up like I'll, I'll, I'll wake up a little early. So I have some time to exercise or I'll wake up a little early so I can chill out with a cup of coffee before I need to get ready for work. There was a shift from that to having this mentality of I want to wake up early so I can start my day out on a positive note and I want to wake up early so I can pour into myself before I get caught up in the hustle and bustle of my day.

So there was a different, there was definitely a shift from this first version of not being super intentional about it, to really starting to feel connected to this time and craving it. So that brings me to this version two of my mornings and this is where the needle really started moving for me. So it was around the time when I actually got inspired to write my book, Think Happy.

So to put a time stamp on it, I would call it, let's call it 2018. OK. So about six years into this morning routine. And at this point, I spent my mornings doing a combination of working exercising, journaling, pouring into my devotional. In fact, I wrote a lot of my book first thing in the morning. And I think the reason for this is a combination, probably of two things.

First, my brain is definitely on its a-game first thing in the morning and second, it was out of necessity. So at this point in time I was working at my 9 to 5 Plus I was teaching, you know, 6 7 8 group fitness classes per week. Plus I sat on the board of directors for Houston's biggest business to Business Marketing Association, which I later became president of plus I was a newlywed and all with that.

I was also trying to maintain my social life. So I didn't exactly have loads of free time to write a book. And that's why I say it was, you know, kind of out of necessity that I wrote my book first thing in the morning. So needless to say without going down a rabbit trail this time in my life was the beginning of a major turning point for me. I didn't know it at the time, but it absolutely was.

And it's also a big reason why I think Cappio is here and why it is what it is today. This was the beginning of me burning the candle at both ends of the stick. And truthfully my mornings turned into work time and they started contributing to this cycle of burning at both ends of the stick, right? So this now is going to bring me to the third and final version of my mornings that I'm gonna share with you.

So this transition, it was a combination of pregnancy and entering motherhood. Ok. So again, like, let's call this 2020. OK. So another two years later, ish plus or minus bear with me. Don't, don't hold me to those numbers anyway. So my pregnancy with Eleanor literally forced me to slow down both physically and mentally. And this is the version of my mornings that I have now and that I have sustained for the past four ish years through two pregnancies through having two babies.

And that I'm still sticking with now that said babies are three years old and one years old. This is the version of my morning routine and I will share with you what it is that has really started to serve me well. And as cheesy as it sounds, this is the version that has really helped me to be the best version of myself. Ok. So this is not anything crazy.

That's not anything fancy schmancy at all, but here is what my current morning routine looks like. So it almost always starts around 5:45, sometimes a little earlier, sometimes a little later. Today I was up at 5:20 and so I alternate between either exercising or spending time with my devotional and journal. Ok. Quiet coffee is always part of it on exercise mornings.

It's immediately after my workout with some sort of looking ahead at my day. And then on journal slash devotional mornings, my quiet coffee is with this journal time, right? Always in one of my favorite chairs. I have two favorite chair. Actually, I have three favorite chairs in my house. One of them is in the playroom. One of them is in the little breakfast nook that sits, sits off of our kitchen and the other one is in my bedroom at the foot of my bed.

Ok. Anyway, fun, fun facts for you. And yeah, that's about it. That consists of what my mornings usually look like. At that point I usually go into chores or getting ready mode depending on the day. I either get myself ready, then get the kids up. But more often than that I get James up, then breakfast ready, then Eleanor up, then I throw myself together usually in leggings, if I'm being honest and get the two of them out the door so that I can get my work day started.

So all in all I have about, I would say anywhere from 1 to 1.5 hours to myself in the morning. That is a lot. I recognize that, but I absolutely would not trade it. And because I really believe that evenings go hand in hand with mornings. I also consider part of my morning routine being just getting in bed with enough time for eight or more hours of sleep.

It is very common for me to turn the light out by nine o'clock ish. So this brings me to the tips that I have for you for sustaining your morning routines. And, these tips are actually specific to mornings. Ok. And they also are the three things that I have done. So my first tip for you is to shift from a daily perspective to a weekly perspective.

Ok. This is something I find myself chatting with many, many, many clients about. Here's what I mean, your morning routine does not need to consist of all of the things that you want to be that you want your morning routine to consist of. Right? If you notice when I shared what my current routine looks like with you, I said that I alternate between either exercising or devotional and journal time, right?

It is rare that I exercise and read my devotional and spend time with my journal all on one morning. I split them up, right? So I have chosen to look at my morning routine from this weekly perspective each week. Am I getting in, you know, three mornings of exercise and two mornings of devotional or journal time or, you know, whatever it looks like for that week.

So first suggestion is to shift from a daily perspective to a weekly perspective. Second up here, make sure the things that you're doing are things that you actually enjoy doing aka make sure they're worth getting up for, right. Getting out of your warm cozy bed. So for me personally, I love exercising. I love it. I got it. It makes me feel so good.

It puts me in such a great mood. I love serving my body that way and exercising is something that for me is worth getting up for. I feel the same exact way about time with my journal time with my devotional, my quiet cup of coffee. I crave it. Ok. But it's important to set yourself up for success from the get go, especially when it comes to your mornings.

Right? You want whatever it is that you're going to be doing with that morning time to be something that you are excited about doing that you're looking forward to that is worth getting out of bed for. Ok. And third tip here is to prioritize sleep still. Ok. So this goes back to setting yourself up for success. If you, if you're getting to bed at midnight, 12:30 it's not fair for you to expect yourself to turn around five hours later and get out of bed to start a morning off.

No, no, you need to be prioritizing sleep. And so for me personally, now that both of my kids are at the point where they typically sleep through the night. I make sure that I get in bed early enough so that I don't feel groggy, waking up from my morning routine. I've said it so many times. I've even said it in this, excuse me in this episode so far.

I truly believe that your evenings go hand in hand with your mornings. Ok. So third tip prioritize sleep and now we have come full circle how your morning routine can actually help you to lighten your mental load. Ok. This is what we are here to talk about. Now, bear with me when you're able to have consistent time to pour into yourself, you'll be creating an outlet for some of the mental load weight that you're carrying.

Right? So, if you don't create an outlet for it, it has nowhere to go. The weight of that mental load has nowhere to go. And that my friend is why it feels like your mental load only grows and never shrinks. Ok? So the beauty in mornings is that the rest of the world has not had the opportunity to derail you. I cannot say this enough. I know that not everyone is an early bird, but that doesn't have to mean that you don't have some morning time to yourself.

Ok? And think about your priorities right now, ask yourself is having an outlet for your mental load important to you. If it is, I challenge you to carve out 15 to 20 minutes of just some morning time for yourself. Maybe start with three mornings a week. That's a fantastic starting point. This is your sign. My challenge to you is to start that this week.

Ok? So again, this morning time allows you to have an outlet for the weight of your mental load. Ok? It has somewhere to go. You have the opportunity to start pouring into yourself. And that is how or one of the ways that your mental load can start feeling less heavy. Ok. So to close out this episode today, we have talked about three versions of my morning routine and I have shared with you what it currently looks like.

We covered tips on sustaining your morning routine. So having a weekly perspective, doing things that you actually enjoy and prioritizing sleep. And finally, we ended with discussing how having this time for yourself. First thing in the morning can actually help you to lessen or lighten or alleviate your mental load. And with that being said, that is a wrap tonight tonight, tonight, tonight, when you set your alarm, I want you to set it for like five minutes earlier than you

normally do. Start with five minute increments. Ok? If you're setting that alarm five minutes earlier, get out of bed five minutes earlier and use that five minutes for yourself, I promise you you will only start to crave more and more time. 

All right, have a wonderful, wonderful rest of your day, rest of your week, rest of your month, rest of just whatever, whatever you're doing right now. Thank you for tuning in and I will be back in your ears next week with another episode of the Think Happy Podcast.