EP 68: Tips for Transition Periods

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Hello, everybody. Welcome to another brand new episode of the Think Happy Podcast. I am your host, Kaitlin Cuevas, and I am just so happy, so happy that you are here giving the Think Happy Podcast just a little space in your ears today. So thanks for that. I am sitting here in my new office in my house, and it has been a long time coming.

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It has been a really long time coming, and it's not finished yet. This whole project on my house is not finished yet, but it is getting close to being finished. So my new office is actually in my closet, which, believe it or not, is quite optimal for podcasting. And before, I had a little makeshift office or desk area, I should say, set up in our dining room at our bay window that overlooked the front of our house to the street. And I will miss the view from that window because it was a nice, huge, beautiful window with so much sunshine.

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But I do have a window right next to my desk still. So yay. Still for having some sunlight and double yay for having a place to work that is more separated from the rest of my house. So, yeah, I'm super duper excited about this. As I'm looking around my new closet, all of the shelves are put up in the clothing rods, but there aren't any clothes on them yet, so it looks pretty bare in here.

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I'm excited for the transition of putting on my clothes in here. And speaking of transitions, I did not plan that set up, by the way. Speaking of transitions, that is what we're talking about today on this episode. So this is a listener requested episode, and it is so extremely timely because I recently have been through a handful of pretty big transitions, so it was a very easy episode for me to put together for you guys. So what we're going to talk about today are just some of my recent transitions, how they've been tough, they've been kind of a struggle.

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We'll talk about why transition periods feel uncomfortable, and of course, we're going to talk about tips for you when you are going through your next transition period. Okay? So before we dive in, I want to let you know that if you had your eyes on the Becoming Your Best You Group program but decided not to hop in, I have something that might be of interest to you. Okay? So I just introduced a new four week private coaching package.

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And that package is going to be perfect for anyone who's been wanting to try out a think happy program without making the commitment for multiple weeks or months. Okay? So inside this package, you get four weeks of private one on one coaching. So that's going to look like four weeks of one on one messaging. Between you and me, that messaging is ongoing every single day of the week.

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Inside of the four weeks, you also get two one on one coaching calls with myself, okay? Those coaching calls, that is just where all of the goodness happens. The four weeks of messaging is really to supplement those two calls. We will accomplish so, so much during those calls. Okay?

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So like I said, this is a fantastic option for you if you're looking to take the first step in prioritizing yourself, okay, and really just serving yourself so that you can, in turn, show up as the best version of you for your family, for your friends, at your job, for all the commitments in your life, okay? So if you have interest in this, send me a DM that says four week package on Instagram. Okay? So if you're interested in this DM me four week package PS. If you're looking for something that's longer term, I have something coming in the very near future that will be right up your alley if something longer term is more what you're looking for.

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So message me new package to make sure you get first dibs at this new exciting thing that I have not told you about yet, but I will tell you about soon. Okay, so back to transitions. Okay, some of the recent transitions that I personally have been to, these have been some big ones, okay? So the first one is leaving my nine to five to give think Happy Co a shot, okay? Just to give it a chance.

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Second one adding James to our family. He's three months old at the time of this recording. So this transition is a very, very new one. Still kind of one that I'm living through. And the third transition is having this house construction, the addition, the remodel, all while these other two transitions were going on.

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Okay? So that house project has just really been quite the cherry on top of these other two. Okay? So in the spirit of full disclosure, each of these transitions, I can't even lie to you, they've been tough. There have been a lot of times where I have struggled.

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The struggle has been unique with each of these. But there have been times without a doubt, that I have struggled with each of these transitions. And the thing is, I knew and I still know that there's not a way around these transitions. There's only a way through. Okay?

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So because of that, because you can't avoid these transitions, and most likely the chance there's a high likelihood that transitions that you're going through also cannot be avoided. Okay. So because there's no way around them, the only option is to go through them. And the beauty is that when you do go through them, you're going to come out on the other side even stronger. Okay.

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So the first thing to keep in mind here is and something that I've been trying to keep in mind is how can I make the most out of this season of transition that is making me feel uncomfortable, right? Because let's just be honest, transitions are not comfortable. They lead to feelings of discomfort, and it's in our human nature to avoid feelings of discomfort. Right. So for me personally, leaving my nine to five, okay, what did that discomfort look like?

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Well, let me tell you. It looked like the uncertainty of not only leaving steady income, but also the uncertainty of starting a business. There's no one out there telling me, like, okay, Caitlin, if you make this leap, it's going to be so worth it. No, there's a lot of uncertainty, and I was really comfortable in my job at my nine to five. I was very comfortable.

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It felt good to have a paycheck that I could rely on. It felt good to know what pretty much each of my days was going to look like every single day. I was really comfortable. And if you listened to the past episode a couple of episodes ago where I just told you guys all about this decision to leave my nine to five, then you already know this, but I really, really enjoyed working with my dad at my nine to five. So my nine to five was working at my family's company that my dad founded, gosh, probably 27 years ago now.

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26, 27 years ago in 1996. So you do the math. I'm not good at doing the math. And I loved working with my dad, and so leaving my job with him presented just a whole new layer of discomfort that was just added to this decision to leave that job with the goal of trying to make think happy, work full time. Okay, so that's how I felt uncomfortable leaving my nine to five.

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How did this transition with adding James to my family, how did that feel uncomfortable? Well, that was probably the biggest transition of all of the ones that I'm telling you about today. But going from one kid to two kids is no joke. It is no laughing matter. It is so gosh darn hard and at the same exact time, it is so fun, and it is so exhausting, and it is so rewarding, and it is so draining, and it's just all of these different things all at the same exact time, and it's a huge transition.

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Right. And so having Ellie, who, when James was born, she wasn't even two years old yet, so having a less than two year old plus a newborn truthfully was just so much more difficult than I could have ever imagined. And now Ellie is two. She turned two in December. James is three months.

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So we're out of that newborn stage. But when I say it was tough, it was tough. And I am so glad that I didn't know how hard it was going to be leading up to it, because I really think I would have been so anxious just about his arrival and bringing him home with Eleanor.

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I guess that's a little side note there. I'm glad I didn't know how hard it was going to be, but lots of discomfort in that transition. And then, like I said, all the while, with the transition of adding James's going on and leaving nine to five in the middle of maternity leave, our house was under construction. And it felt like I was never alone in my home. It felt like there were always people here.

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Everything was out of place. Like even the physical items in my house, I felt like, didn't have a home. And if you've been hanging around, think happy for a while, you know that I am a very compartmentalized person. And so feeling like nothing had a home inside of my house, just that in and of itself was very uncomfortable. And add to that just feeling like I couldn't nurse in certain rooms in my house because there were construction workers who would be able to see inside of the windows.

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And sometimes it felt like James had nowhere to nap because you could hear all of the hammering and the power tools and various rooms in the house. And it felt like I didn't have a home inside of my own home. Without trying to sound too dramatic, but truthfully, that is how it felt during that period of time. So why do transition periods feel so uncomfortable to us? Right?

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The funny thing about it is, a lot of the times, transition is part of the process. It's part of your journey to go from point A to point B. And like we said earlier, it is unavoidable. And so it's unavoidable. But why does it feel so uncomfortable?

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So that's what I want to talk to you about right now. When we are going through a transition, we are out of our normal routine, right? Whether or not you're a person who has a bunch of routines in your life, whether or not you have a morning routine, an exercise routine, an evening routine, your life most likely has some sort of normal routine to it. And when we're going through a transition period, we're taken out of that normal routine, okay? And just by nature, we dread change.

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Think about it. Have you ever been on a trip and you're having so much fun on that trip, but at the same time, you're really looking forward to coming back home? I bet you have. That just goes to show we crave routine. And as I'm sitting here talking about this babies crave routine, right?

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Babies crave having some sort of structure to their days. It's why we're taught that having a bath right before bedtime is a great part to start to is a great way to start introducing a nighttime routine to our babies, right? So we have a nighttime bath, and then we get in jammies, and then we have a bottle of milk, or we nurse, and then the sound machine goes on, and then you get swaddled. All of that is part of a baby's bedtime routine. And so it makes me wonder, is craving routine just innate?

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I don't know. I'll have to look it up. I don't know the answer to that. It's just a thought that I had right now as I'm sitting here talking to you guys about transitions forcing us out of our normal routines. So along with feeling uncomfortable when we're outside of our normal routines, along with just dreading change, as humans, we also crave stability.

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And often transitions come with feelings of uncertainty, okay? And so for me, this has looked like the uncertainty of think happy, like I already told you, the uncertainty of what my life was going to look like with two kids. The uncertainty of even when this house project was going to be finished. Because let me tell you, it was supposed to be finished months ago. It was supposed to be finished before James was even born.

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And here I am, three and a half months into James's life, and it still isn't finished. Okay? So that is why transition periods feel uncomfortable for us. It takes us out of our normal routine. We dread change, and with transitions come change, and we crave stability, we crave certainty.

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And inside of transitions, we don't have that.

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So let's talk about what we can do about this. Okay? So as we've already said, there's no way around transitions. Your only route is through transitions. Okay?

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So we might as well make the best of them. I have some tips for you. Let me count to see how many I have for you. 123-4567. I have seven tips for you.

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This is such good stuff. Okay, let's talk about the first one. Oops, there we go. Where did you go? First tip.

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Okay, here we are. First tip. Is to trust your gut, okay? Call it your gut, call it intuition, whatever you want to call it. Trust it.

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It's there for a reason and it's talking to you. All you have to do is listen. Okay? So for me, my gut told me that now is the time to take the leap with think happy Co. Was it scary?

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Heck yeah. Is it still scary? Heck yeah. Do I feel like it was the right decision again? Heck yeah, I do.

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Okay? I trusted my gut. I trusted my intuition. That is tip one, trust your gut. Tip two, get back to the basics.

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Okay, so when I work with my clients, we often talk about our foundation for things. Here's what that means. So your foundation for your morning routine might be the two or three most important parts of your morning routine that if you do nothing else in your morning routine, you at least are glad that you did those. So maybe for you, that's having a quiet cup of coffee and making your to do list for the day. So when I talk about getting back to the basics during a transition period, I'm talking much more broadly than just one or two routines, okay?

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So I'm talking about getting back to the basics of your life, okay? So this would be your foundation for that. This would be the basics of keeping your cup filled. So for me, again, I'll use myself as an example here. For me, my morning me time and exercising are two of my basics, okay?

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They're two of my foundations. These are two things that if I'm at least able to get even one of them done, I instantly start feeling more like me, more like myself again. And in a transition period, it's so important to hang on to your sense of self, okay? So this particular tip of getting back to the basics has been especially helpful for me in my transition of adding James to our family. Okay?

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So tip number three here we have 15 minutes bucket list. Okay? Sorry, not 15 minutes bucket list. 15 minutes happiness bucket list. That's a very important word inside of the title of this one.

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So the essence of a 15 minutes happiness bucket list is to have a list of 50 or more things that you can do inside of 15 minutes or less that will bring you happiness. Okay? I'm going to say that a lot because that was a mouthful. A 15 minutes happiness bucket list is a list of 550 or more things that you can do inside a 15 one five minutes or less that will bring you happiness. Okay?

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I have a whole episode on why and how to create your own bucket list. I'm going to try to remember to link that episode in the show notes for you, okay? So if you haven't heard that, go back and listen to that episode. It really is a great one. I actually think it was one of the most popular episodes from 2022 anyway.

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So when you're going through a transition period, having a bucket list like this is going to help you keep your cup filled. And I want you to remember, we serve others better when we serve ourselves first, okay? And so others that can look like other people, your friends, your family, your coworkers, your boss, your peers, it can also look like other commitments or work or whatever. Right? We serve others better when we serve ourselves first.

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And that is the whole purpose of the 15 Minutes Happiness Bucket list, okay? It's to serve yourself first in doing something so small that only takes 15 minutes or less. Okay? So tip number four here is to lean on your support crew. I cannot emphasize this enough.

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We are not intended to do life alone, okay? Lean on your family. Lean on your friends for support. And while you're at it, verbalize how people can help you. No one is a mind reader.

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You only do yourself a disservice if you expect others to inherently know how to best support you. You don't know how to support your friends, your family, your loved ones without them telling you. So we can't expect others to just know how to support ourselves. And again, in the spirit of full disclosure, I know this is so much easier said than done, and it's something that I still have to make an intentional effort on. It's tough, verbalizing stuff like this.

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It feels vulnerable, it feels a little uncomfortable. But you only do yourself a disservice if you don't push through that discomfort, if you don't push through that vulnerability. Wow. Tongue twister right there. So I have leaned on my parents so much during the transition of adding James to our family.

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I really, truly cannot give them enough kudos. They have helped with Eleanor. They've watched her during the day. They've had sleepovers with her. They've helped me with shuttling her around.

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They've helped me around the house with laundry and cooking and cleaning up and gosh, just so many things. And of course, they've helped me with James. And sometimes that help just is as simple as holding him. But a small thing like that is huge, right? It gives me hands to play with Ellie, to hold Ellie, to still be Eleanor's mom, because she is also going through a huge transition with becoming a big sister.

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She lived almost two years of her life as an only child. Adding James to the family is not just a transition for myself and Oakley. It's also a ginormous transition for Eleanor, too. So lean on your support crew. Again, if I had to pick a most important one, that's going to be one of my most important tips right there.

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Okay, moving along, tip number five, practice daily gratitude. Really? This one is part of my foundations also, so I guess this really could go under going back or like getting back to your basics, at least for myself. So when life feels tough, lean heavily into gratitude. And the thing is, it doesn't even have to be super time consuming or look super fancy, right?

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That's the best part about it. It can literally be as simple as taking two minutes in the car to turn off whatever you're listening to and think of everything that you're grateful for in that moment. That's how simple it can be. It can also be super duper fancy, schmancy, and consist of having a beautiful gratitude journal that you keep up with a couple of times a week. Or it could be a guided meditation that focuses on gratitude.

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It doesn't matter how. What matters is that you do it, okay? And so in all of my recent transitions, I have been insanely intentional about sticking with daily gratitude. My go to gratitude practice is a small gratitude journal that I write in each night. It's so simple, guys.

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I just write down three things from that day that I'm grateful for. Sometimes I'm not in the mood to do it. Sometimes I'm just exhausted and I want to get into bed without doing it. But let me tell you right now, I never once have regretted taking the 30 seconds that it takes to write down three things that I'm grateful for from that day. Okay, next tip.

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We're on the 6th tip. This one is so simple, but so impactful, and that is to use light to your advantage. If it can be natural, sunlight even better. But if weather isn't cooperating, then utilize light inside. So I'm sure you already know this, but I'm going to just remind you right now that sunlight increases your dopamine levels.

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And so dopamine is a neurotransmitter that your body makes that allows you to feel satisfaction, pleasure, happiness, all of those feel good things. And so when we are in sunlight, it naturally boosts those dopamine levels. This is such a good simple hack that is especially helpful in transition periods. Okay, last but not least, I already said that I thought that I had a favorite tip, but maybe this one actually is going to be my favorite tip. I don't know.

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I don't want to pick a favorite. Don't make me pick a favorite. They're all super great. So this 7th tip is to become extra aware of your warning signs, okay? So when you're able to catch a spiral or a meltdown or an anxiety attack or a panic attack before it hits, I mean, I don't have to tell you that it's so much better than having that spiral or meltdown or anxiety attack actually hit, right?

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So catch it before it happens. The only way to catch it before it happens is to tune in to what your body and mind is telling you, okay? And the best way to do that is to hone in on your warning signs. Okay? What I mean by warning signs is when your body is telling you that you're about to have a meltdown, that you're about to have a panic attack, chances are your body has warning signs.

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For me, I know that some of my warning signs are not asking for help and really being a martyr and just trying to do it all. Another warning sign is when I become hyper organized, but at the same time, I feel like I have short term memory loss. And when I say hyper organized, like, not just regular day to day organization, because you guys also know that I love organization, organizing my days, organizing my time, organizing my house, when I become hyper organized, that is a warning sign for me. And again, that feeling of short term memory loss. I find a lot of times that when I start feeling like I don't have the capacity to remember things like things in the short term that that is going hand in hand with Hyper organization.

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Those are some really key indicators for me that I'm about to hit. Tilt right. So when I start to notice those warning signs creeping up, I know that I need to listen. I need to listen to those warning signs and not just brush them under the rug. I need to deal with them head on.

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So, yeah, become extra aware of your warning signs. That's tip seven. So those are my tips, the seven tips for when you are going through a transition period. I hope that one, two, even three of those tips resonated with you and is something that you can try when you go through your next transition period. Okay, so let's do a quick recap of what we've talked about today.

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We started today's episode by talking about some of my recent transitions. We talked about why transitions feel uncomfortable, and then we talked about tips for when you go through your next transition. Those tips are getting back to the basics using a 15 minutes happiness bucket list. I skipped the first one. The first one was trusting Your gut.

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Okay. Leaning On Your Support crew daily Gratitude utilizing Sunshine And the last one, becoming extra aware of your warning signs. Okay, so that is a wrap, my friend, for this week's episode of the Think Happy podcast. Don't forget, if that four week private coaching package sounds interesting to you, if that's something that you want to learn more about, send me a DM on Instagram. In that DM, all you have to write is four week package.

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Okay? And I will get the conversation started. We'll get the ball rolling together. Thank you so very much for tuning into this episode. And, yeah, share it with a friend.

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Share it with someone who you know is going through a transition period or is about to go through a transition period. My sister Bailey's calling me right now. So I'm going to wrap up this episode, and I'll be back in your ears next week with another episode of the Think Happy Podcast.

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From the bottom of my heart, thank you for joining me for this week's episode of the Think Happy podcast. If you just can't get enough, find me on instagram at @thinkhappy_co and online at thinkhapyco.com. See you next week.